It's on fire,
it's hot as hell.
Hotter than lava, as far as I can tell.
It's poisonous,
truly, liquified death.
My mind I detest.
It's fouler than rot,
more decrepit than decay.
There's nothing left,
so I play.
It bores into me; squeezes outta every pore,
My mind I deplore.
It shakes my soul,
it cracks my bones,
it keeps me different,
from all the drones.
It causes my to cry,
begging to die,
yet it's the one thing,
that helps my eyes dry.
It's stupidly studious,
in informing me I'm smart enough to know I'm dumb,
My mind makes me numb.
It knows my hearts joy,
imploring it to understand sorrow,
It lives for today,
never tomorrow.
It keeps me happily sad,
always mad.
It wants me to become a dad,
Yet won't let me cum.
My mind I know the best.
It talks in whispers,
sings in deafening tones,
it sits atop three separate thrones.
God of my body,
Devil of my heart,
it tells me,
when the pain starts.
It's spastically languid,
cheerfully melancholy,
blithe,
it charges to my folly.
It contradicts insanity,
but it's never sane,
This is the story,
of my brain.
Friday, December 14, 2012
Monday, December 3, 2012
Do you know the definition of Insanity?
The definition of insanity.
1: a deranged state of the mind usually occurring as a specific disorder (as schizophrenia)
2: such unsoundness of mind or lack of understanding as prevents one from having the mental capacity required by law to enter into a particular relationship, status, or transaction or as removes one from criminal or civil responsibility
3 a : extreme folly or unreasonableness
b : something utterly foolish or unreasonable
Nowhere here is the definition of insanity that has been popularized with our generation by the game Far Cry 3. When I heard that I actually went and look insanity up again because I thought I might've been mistaken. Turns out I wasn't. The thing I wanted to address about this is the falsification of information. Sure it's given to you in a medium that is supposed to entertain you and not inform you, but that's still not a valid excuse. Unfortunately, most people (Americans) don't have the proper sense to question the information they're given so fallacy becomes truth to them.
I just realized something, this is the first blog I've written since the confirmation of my lack of sanity. Hows that for you? A person who happens to be insane cares about people getting the proper information on what it means to be insane. Don't you think I should be flipping out; don't you think I should be talking crazy?! When people find out that I'm not completely sane I can almost feel their condescending weighing down on me.
It'll be a year January 26th. One year of the rest of my fucking life. To be told by someone that you'll never get better. That as the years go on it'll only get worse. For the rest of my life. The, rest, of, my, life. Do tell me, how is one supposed to go on with his life in a positive demeanor when you have some shit like that simmering in the back of his head. Oh, I should probably mention that I happen to be one of those suicidal types. Not stupid fucking kid, omg mai crush dusent luv me I'm gunna go cut my arm shit, I mean the kind that wakes up and tells himself "I think I want to kill myself today". I could've had a perfect day and night the day before, but something in me just gives. It tells me to just let go. It tells me that I need to be selfish once. It tells me that all I do is cause the people I love to hurt. It tells me this sweetly, almost angelic (in the vocal sense). Then it taunts me. Now after reading that, one might think all I have to do is conquer that voice and I'll be free. What you fail to understand is that voice isn't some enemy. That voice is me. My true self, expressing my true desires. The funny thing is I have these kinds of conversations all the time with myself. Due to my antisocial tendencies, I've created two companions out of my consciousness, only giving them names about 8 years ago. I will omit their names from this blog because that information isn't relevant for you to know. Actually, I'm not going to give any more information on this. If you don't understand my reasoning, then you've missed my point and I have nothing further to discuss.
1: a deranged state of the mind usually occurring as a specific disorder (as schizophrenia)
2: such unsoundness of mind or lack of understanding as prevents one from having the mental capacity required by law to enter into a particular relationship, status, or transaction or as removes one from criminal or civil responsibility
3 a : extreme folly or unreasonableness
b : something utterly foolish or unreasonable
Nowhere here is the definition of insanity that has been popularized with our generation by the game Far Cry 3. When I heard that I actually went and look insanity up again because I thought I might've been mistaken. Turns out I wasn't. The thing I wanted to address about this is the falsification of information. Sure it's given to you in a medium that is supposed to entertain you and not inform you, but that's still not a valid excuse. Unfortunately, most people (Americans) don't have the proper sense to question the information they're given so fallacy becomes truth to them.
I just realized something, this is the first blog I've written since the confirmation of my lack of sanity. Hows that for you? A person who happens to be insane cares about people getting the proper information on what it means to be insane. Don't you think I should be flipping out; don't you think I should be talking crazy?! When people find out that I'm not completely sane I can almost feel their condescending weighing down on me.
It'll be a year January 26th. One year of the rest of my fucking life. To be told by someone that you'll never get better. That as the years go on it'll only get worse. For the rest of my life. The, rest, of, my, life. Do tell me, how is one supposed to go on with his life in a positive demeanor when you have some shit like that simmering in the back of his head. Oh, I should probably mention that I happen to be one of those suicidal types. Not stupid fucking kid, omg mai crush dusent luv me I'm gunna go cut my arm shit, I mean the kind that wakes up and tells himself "I think I want to kill myself today". I could've had a perfect day and night the day before, but something in me just gives. It tells me to just let go. It tells me that I need to be selfish once. It tells me that all I do is cause the people I love to hurt. It tells me this sweetly, almost angelic (in the vocal sense). Then it taunts me. Now after reading that, one might think all I have to do is conquer that voice and I'll be free. What you fail to understand is that voice isn't some enemy. That voice is me. My true self, expressing my true desires. The funny thing is I have these kinds of conversations all the time with myself. Due to my antisocial tendencies, I've created two companions out of my consciousness, only giving them names about 8 years ago. I will omit their names from this blog because that information isn't relevant for you to know. Actually, I'm not going to give any more information on this. If you don't understand my reasoning, then you've missed my point and I have nothing further to discuss.
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