Wednesday June 10th 2015 02:36
Yo motha fucka, hows it been? In North Carolina? Shitty. But that's why you're working hard. That's why you put up with living with your parents at the age of 25. You're doing it though, keep the fuck at it. I know for a fact, that one day down the road you'll look back on this and feel proud of coming this far. Fuck yeah, go us. Is Sanji still there? I know Oshi's still there. Have we got a woman? What about the truck? Is that still the goal? Remember, swordfish ceviche, boss right? Just in case here is the recipe:
CEVICHE
Swordfish
Lime juice
Jalapenos
Red onion
Salt
GARNISH
Red onion (julianne'd thin)
Jalapenos (diced)
Ok, listening to Hed PE radio, jamming the fuck out. I'm high as fuck right now, so I'm going to be typing sporadically. Terrace Cafe? Awesome job with cool people.
Thursday, June 11, 2015
Friday, December 14, 2012
It's Maddening
It's on fire,
it's hot as hell.
Hotter than lava, as far as I can tell.
It's poisonous,
truly, liquified death.
My mind I detest.
It's fouler than rot,
more decrepit than decay.
There's nothing left,
so I play.
It bores into me; squeezes outta every pore,
My mind I deplore.
It shakes my soul,
it cracks my bones,
it keeps me different,
from all the drones.
It causes my to cry,
begging to die,
yet it's the one thing,
that helps my eyes dry.
It's stupidly studious,
in informing me I'm smart enough to know I'm dumb,
My mind makes me numb.
It knows my hearts joy,
imploring it to understand sorrow,
It lives for today,
never tomorrow.
It keeps me happily sad,
always mad.
It wants me to become a dad,
Yet won't let me cum.
My mind I know the best.
It talks in whispers,
sings in deafening tones,
it sits atop three separate thrones.
God of my body,
Devil of my heart,
it tells me,
when the pain starts.
It's spastically languid,
cheerfully melancholy,
blithe,
it charges to my folly.
It contradicts insanity,
but it's never sane,
This is the story,
of my brain.
it's hot as hell.
Hotter than lava, as far as I can tell.
It's poisonous,
truly, liquified death.
My mind I detest.
It's fouler than rot,
more decrepit than decay.
There's nothing left,
so I play.
It bores into me; squeezes outta every pore,
My mind I deplore.
It shakes my soul,
it cracks my bones,
it keeps me different,
from all the drones.
It causes my to cry,
begging to die,
yet it's the one thing,
that helps my eyes dry.
It's stupidly studious,
in informing me I'm smart enough to know I'm dumb,
My mind makes me numb.
It knows my hearts joy,
imploring it to understand sorrow,
It lives for today,
never tomorrow.
It keeps me happily sad,
always mad.
It wants me to become a dad,
Yet won't let me cum.
My mind I know the best.
It talks in whispers,
sings in deafening tones,
it sits atop three separate thrones.
God of my body,
Devil of my heart,
it tells me,
when the pain starts.
It's spastically languid,
cheerfully melancholy,
blithe,
it charges to my folly.
It contradicts insanity,
but it's never sane,
This is the story,
of my brain.
Monday, December 3, 2012
Do you know the definition of Insanity?
The definition of insanity.
1: a deranged state of the mind usually occurring as a specific disorder (as schizophrenia)
2: such unsoundness of mind or lack of understanding as prevents one from having the mental capacity required by law to enter into a particular relationship, status, or transaction or as removes one from criminal or civil responsibility
3 a : extreme folly or unreasonableness
b : something utterly foolish or unreasonable
Nowhere here is the definition of insanity that has been popularized with our generation by the game Far Cry 3. When I heard that I actually went and look insanity up again because I thought I might've been mistaken. Turns out I wasn't. The thing I wanted to address about this is the falsification of information. Sure it's given to you in a medium that is supposed to entertain you and not inform you, but that's still not a valid excuse. Unfortunately, most people (Americans) don't have the proper sense to question the information they're given so fallacy becomes truth to them.
I just realized something, this is the first blog I've written since the confirmation of my lack of sanity. Hows that for you? A person who happens to be insane cares about people getting the proper information on what it means to be insane. Don't you think I should be flipping out; don't you think I should be talking crazy?! When people find out that I'm not completely sane I can almost feel their condescending weighing down on me.
It'll be a year January 26th. One year of the rest of my fucking life. To be told by someone that you'll never get better. That as the years go on it'll only get worse. For the rest of my life. The, rest, of, my, life. Do tell me, how is one supposed to go on with his life in a positive demeanor when you have some shit like that simmering in the back of his head. Oh, I should probably mention that I happen to be one of those suicidal types. Not stupid fucking kid, omg mai crush dusent luv me I'm gunna go cut my arm shit, I mean the kind that wakes up and tells himself "I think I want to kill myself today". I could've had a perfect day and night the day before, but something in me just gives. It tells me to just let go. It tells me that I need to be selfish once. It tells me that all I do is cause the people I love to hurt. It tells me this sweetly, almost angelic (in the vocal sense). Then it taunts me. Now after reading that, one might think all I have to do is conquer that voice and I'll be free. What you fail to understand is that voice isn't some enemy. That voice is me. My true self, expressing my true desires. The funny thing is I have these kinds of conversations all the time with myself. Due to my antisocial tendencies, I've created two companions out of my consciousness, only giving them names about 8 years ago. I will omit their names from this blog because that information isn't relevant for you to know. Actually, I'm not going to give any more information on this. If you don't understand my reasoning, then you've missed my point and I have nothing further to discuss.
1: a deranged state of the mind usually occurring as a specific disorder (as schizophrenia)
2: such unsoundness of mind or lack of understanding as prevents one from having the mental capacity required by law to enter into a particular relationship, status, or transaction or as removes one from criminal or civil responsibility
3 a : extreme folly or unreasonableness
b : something utterly foolish or unreasonable
Nowhere here is the definition of insanity that has been popularized with our generation by the game Far Cry 3. When I heard that I actually went and look insanity up again because I thought I might've been mistaken. Turns out I wasn't. The thing I wanted to address about this is the falsification of information. Sure it's given to you in a medium that is supposed to entertain you and not inform you, but that's still not a valid excuse. Unfortunately, most people (Americans) don't have the proper sense to question the information they're given so fallacy becomes truth to them.
I just realized something, this is the first blog I've written since the confirmation of my lack of sanity. Hows that for you? A person who happens to be insane cares about people getting the proper information on what it means to be insane. Don't you think I should be flipping out; don't you think I should be talking crazy?! When people find out that I'm not completely sane I can almost feel their condescending weighing down on me.
It'll be a year January 26th. One year of the rest of my fucking life. To be told by someone that you'll never get better. That as the years go on it'll only get worse. For the rest of my life. The, rest, of, my, life. Do tell me, how is one supposed to go on with his life in a positive demeanor when you have some shit like that simmering in the back of his head. Oh, I should probably mention that I happen to be one of those suicidal types. Not stupid fucking kid, omg mai crush dusent luv me I'm gunna go cut my arm shit, I mean the kind that wakes up and tells himself "I think I want to kill myself today". I could've had a perfect day and night the day before, but something in me just gives. It tells me to just let go. It tells me that I need to be selfish once. It tells me that all I do is cause the people I love to hurt. It tells me this sweetly, almost angelic (in the vocal sense). Then it taunts me. Now after reading that, one might think all I have to do is conquer that voice and I'll be free. What you fail to understand is that voice isn't some enemy. That voice is me. My true self, expressing my true desires. The funny thing is I have these kinds of conversations all the time with myself. Due to my antisocial tendencies, I've created two companions out of my consciousness, only giving them names about 8 years ago. I will omit their names from this blog because that information isn't relevant for you to know. Actually, I'm not going to give any more information on this. If you don't understand my reasoning, then you've missed my point and I have nothing further to discuss.
Saturday, November 12, 2011
I feel like writing shit again
Hello and salutations to those of you bored enough to traverse this hole in the internet that is my blog. Once more I've decided to do a "I feel like writing shit" blog. Those of you who've been here prior should have expected this. I try to keep my word even though my word is 9 fucking months old. Oh well, shit happens I guess. I only wish I could implement some of the things I write on here; but alas, I'm rambling. I think it's about time to the this fucking shit show on the road!
I think I'm gonna stick with the format I used last time. If you don't like it, well refer to my previous entries introduction. You'll find my stance on the matter there. More notably you should look for a phone number to contact.
+ If I went to a rally about gay rights, Id have a sign that would say: "As long as someone makes me a sandwich, I don't give a fuck.
+ If I were to rule China, I'd break Mongolia's city (pronounced "shitty") walls in reparations.
+ If I feel like punching someone in the fucking face, telling me to calm down is like shooting napalm at an oil rig that is set ablaze, hoping it will quell the flames.
***If by some chance anyone I worked with at Ryan's ever sees this; Now do you understand why Ron pissed me off so much? If so, leave me your answer/understanding in the comments***
+ If I were to give a fuck about the people in North Carolina as much as I do the people in Wisconsin (my girlfriend excluded), may the almighty Bob strike me in the nuts.
+ I've haven't been really lazy about my blogging in 2011, I've been really lazy about my posting in 2011.
+ Having a girlfriend who encourages me to play video games is great. Now if I can find the budgeting for video games. Damn you irony; you coy bastard.
As of yesterday, the Elder Scrolls 5: Skyrim has come out. If you love the series, then good for you. If you don't love the series, that's alright too. However, if you don't like the series and have friends who do then you call them a "nerd" for liking it or any other video game for that matter, then fuck you. Also your understanding of the word "nerd" needs to be reevaluated.
Here's something I wanted to do in last I.F.L.W.S. blog but didn't. Welcome, the top list. On the menu this blog: The top companies I hate.
1. Buffets inc: I worked for there corporation for about a year. The only thing I learned from this experience is that I will never dine at one of there cesspools again. For anyone who has kept in touch with me in the past year; you should know why this is first on the list.
2. Wal-Mart: I may buy from them, but that's because (like many other people) I have no choice but to.
3. Apple inc: I know I have some friends that are in fact, on Apple's dick. This is reason enough not to like them or their shitty, flashed up pieces of out-dated bullshit. Not taking into account that they're selling this shit and people are actually stupid enough to buy it.
Hmm... I should find more companies to hate. For now though, this should suffice. If you have any idea on what my next top list should be, drop me a line in the comments. If your suggestion is good enough I'll use it and give you props in the next I.F.L.W.S. blog. Ah, well
BREAK TIME!
Spiderman up in dis bitch!
And some other pics that tickled me.
After seeing that, I was like:
Sunday, February 6, 2011
I Feel Like Writing Shit
So that's exactly what I'm going to do. This isn't a real "blog" per say, but read this shit anyway because you know it'll be dope.
To start off, I'm going to list some shit I like. Gotta problem with that? Take it up with HR. There location is up your ass; there phone number 1-800-stfunub. Hope you enjoyed that bit, now on to what I said I was gonna do.
I don't think that I ever could be "Star struck". But if I would give that honor to anyone, it would have to be Dave Grohl.
I like either geeky/nerdy girls or dark/goth girls. I guess my reasoning for this is that both of these types of women are creative, intelligent and for the most part misunderstood. Not only that, the only difference with the two types is dark chicks are openly freaky while geeky chicks are secretly freaky. Either way, I win.
***Small note here; Dark chicks are the ones who like talking about blowing up things in gritty detail but would give there life to protect a puppy. Not like psycho chicks who talk about blowing up puppies in gritty detail. That's shit's not cool.***
Cloudy sky days are very calming to me. I can't really explain it, there just wonderful. The world around you is illuminated, but not shining. It makes everything seem so soft and innocent, if just for a moment.
In respect to some of the things I like; normally awesome quotes, I refrain from trying to get them into the mainstream. The reason why I don't lets peeps in on the goods is because I don't want the awesomeness I enjoy so much bastardized by you lot. Don't act like it wouldn't happen, were awful persons. There is one I will give you though. I don't think you all can really warp this, that and it isn't really some secret nugget, it's just fuckin funny:
Don't you just miss the days of the gentlemen?
If I ran a country here is how things would go down:
+ If you want to vacation in my country, you must pass an IQ test (105 passes)
+ Depending on the circumstance, hitting someone in the balls will be charged just as severely as attempted murder
+ Marijuana will be legalized. Not so stoners can enjoy there hobby out in the open, but to make my country a exporter of hemp products. Things such as paper products, medicines, and textiles. This is a market untouched by the U.S. so I see it as a good investment.
+ Illegal immigrants will not be tolerated. Employers (including private citizens) who have hired Illegals will have to pay a fine and pay the fees for the illegal to become a citizen, and/or have the person who hired them and that companies CEO and/or president work for the same wages as the illegal for 1 year. A second offense warrants expulsion from my country.
+ There will be a clear separation of church and state. Any and all religious context in any official governed text or building will be rendered faulty.
+ There will be no life imprisonment for those who admit to killing another person or animal (domestic) intentionally without the proper licensing. You will be killed in the fashion you murdered in, then ground up and turned into compost.
*** note on licensing: the way this will work is for example someone admitted to killing a family member of yours or has been identified as the murderer (with a .01% margin of error but seeing as everyone here has an above average IQ, I think were good) you my get a certificate of Vendetta from your local police station and you get to hunt down that fuck bag and invoke your own justice. Old school son!
+Public Displays of Affection will be tasteful (no tongue, no dry humping) and in some areas (i.e. food courts) not allowed.
+ There will be no Starbucks.
+ You must speak our countries official language while in public. Places of language learning are exempt.
Well I hope this was a good time waster for you all. Although I know the likely hood of someone reading this is low, I still enjoyed getting to write this. I think I may do a couple of "I Feel Like Writing Shit" blogs, because I had a lot of fun with this. Ok peeps, I'm out.
To start off, I'm going to list some shit I like. Gotta problem with that? Take it up with HR. There location is up your ass; there phone number 1-800-stfunub. Hope you enjoyed that bit, now on to what I said I was gonna do.
I don't think that I ever could be "Star struck". But if I would give that honor to anyone, it would have to be Dave Grohl.
I like either geeky/nerdy girls or dark/goth girls. I guess my reasoning for this is that both of these types of women are creative, intelligent and for the most part misunderstood. Not only that, the only difference with the two types is dark chicks are openly freaky while geeky chicks are secretly freaky. Either way, I win.
***Small note here; Dark chicks are the ones who like talking about blowing up things in gritty detail but would give there life to protect a puppy. Not like psycho chicks who talk about blowing up puppies in gritty detail. That's shit's not cool.***
Cloudy sky days are very calming to me. I can't really explain it, there just wonderful. The world around you is illuminated, but not shining. It makes everything seem so soft and innocent, if just for a moment.
In respect to some of the things I like; normally awesome quotes, I refrain from trying to get them into the mainstream. The reason why I don't lets peeps in on the goods is because I don't want the awesomeness I enjoy so much bastardized by you lot. Don't act like it wouldn't happen, were awful persons. There is one I will give you though. I don't think you all can really warp this, that and it isn't really some secret nugget, it's just fuckin funny:
Don't you just miss the days of the gentlemen?
If I ran a country here is how things would go down:
+ If you want to vacation in my country, you must pass an IQ test (105 passes)
+ Depending on the circumstance, hitting someone in the balls will be charged just as severely as attempted murder
+ Marijuana will be legalized. Not so stoners can enjoy there hobby out in the open, but to make my country a exporter of hemp products. Things such as paper products, medicines, and textiles. This is a market untouched by the U.S. so I see it as a good investment.
+ Illegal immigrants will not be tolerated. Employers (including private citizens) who have hired Illegals will have to pay a fine and pay the fees for the illegal to become a citizen, and/or have the person who hired them and that companies CEO and/or president work for the same wages as the illegal for 1 year. A second offense warrants expulsion from my country.
+ There will be a clear separation of church and state. Any and all religious context in any official governed text or building will be rendered faulty.
+ There will be no life imprisonment for those who admit to killing another person or animal (domestic) intentionally without the proper licensing. You will be killed in the fashion you murdered in, then ground up and turned into compost.
*** note on licensing: the way this will work is for example someone admitted to killing a family member of yours or has been identified as the murderer (with a .01% margin of error but seeing as everyone here has an above average IQ, I think were good) you my get a certificate of Vendetta from your local police station and you get to hunt down that fuck bag and invoke your own justice. Old school son!
+Public Displays of Affection will be tasteful (no tongue, no dry humping) and in some areas (i.e. food courts) not allowed.
+ There will be no Starbucks.
+ You must speak our countries official language while in public. Places of language learning are exempt.
Well I hope this was a good time waster for you all. Although I know the likely hood of someone reading this is low, I still enjoyed getting to write this. I think I may do a couple of "I Feel Like Writing Shit" blogs, because I had a lot of fun with this. Ok peeps, I'm out.
Saturday, November 27, 2010
New Grounds
Well kids, it's been a spell. I suppose I owe you all a update huh? I'll get to all that jazz once I'm done with my introduction. So, I'm seriously hating fall in NC. It's still in the high 60's/ low 70's during the day (update*: it took until Sunday Dec. 5th for it to start being cold during the day (low 40's). I know this might seem crazy to some people but I actually like Wisconsin's Fall/winters. It's what I grew up with and it's what I know. This, no cold, no snow shit is creeping my out. Fuck, even some of the grass is still green! It took us getting a days worth of sleet here for the rest of the leaves to fall down; I'm talking roughly 50% of the leaves. I'm not sure I mentioned this before, but North Carolina fuckin blows. Hmm, I'm not quite sure that this is an adequate intro but fuck it, I have a shit load to say and a whole lot of time to say it in. That's not to say if I don't hurry with this I'll become fucking bored with it and I'll never finish the shit. So with further ado brought to you by nagging fucks...... fucking nagging fucks fucking with me..... This introduction has been brought to you by the letter F, more importantly the word fuck. There we are, now with no further bullshit, I submit this intro as complete. Shut the fuck up.
NOVEMBER
Sorry for being a lazy ass for the month. I wanted to write but hell, I was busy playing games online and generally being miserable about not having a job, then about being in NC. Oh, yeah, I got a job on the 11th. Where you might ask? A place called Ryan's. It's owned by buffets inc., the same people that own O.C.B. At first I was happy to be working for a corporation, stability wise at least. How fucking wrong was I? After my first day I asked about getting my schedule. They told me they would call me. As an added measure of security I told them that I would call them too just in case they lost my number or something. I called them once on Friday, Saturday and Sunday (mind you I started working on a Wednesday) each time they told me it wasn't ready and they'd give a call when it was. They never called me. Then the following Tuesday at 16:15, I get a call from them saying I was supposed to be there 15 minutes ago. At that time not only was I not ready (i.e. showered & shaved) , I wasn't even home. So I rushed home got my shit and made it to work by 5:26. When I get there my manager Buddy (his name is really Buddy) cracked a joke about my tardiness; he was the one who was supposed to contact me about my schedule. I was fucking livid. If I was white I'm sure I would have been beet red with rage. Not only was I mad as fuck but I also wasn't used to the volume of work I was doing so I screwed up a hell of lot that day. Fast forward a week, things start panning out and I'm getting used to everything. I find out that I'm working Thanksgiving woo fucking hoo. It ended up working out though because me ma ended up working thanksgiving too. So we had thanksgiving dinner the day after. That about wraps up November.
But before I consider Nov. complete, here is what work looks like for me.
Break time #1
Sometimes in life you'll have to do some shit that you don't want to do. Better buck the fuck up Gordon Freeman style!
***Resume Session***
DECEMBER
Ah, December the month that really made me start missing home and other stuff too.
So going into December, I'm used to work, being isolated, and I've stopped giving a shit about the people I live and work around, at least the ones who are from here, and that one F.I.B. at Wal-mart. I remember one day before work I was messing around on my phone and I decided to look at all the pictures I took. All those good memories. All the stuff I loved. I swear at that moment I was crying, but no tears came out. It was as if my heart was sinking into nothingness. It felt truly awful, horrific really. I felt like I was never going to see anyone again. Like it was impossible to return to my life. So I went to work, stewing in that mindset. I've been slowly distancing myself from my co-workers ever since. I can't enjoy anything living so far away from my life. It would be different if I came down here for myself, but I didn't. I came down here because my mom needed the help. I'm hoping my dad can get back on his feet and start working before I go. I know that my mom can't support the way they live right now, and if my dad gets a job I will no longer be duty bound to stay. Whoa, I'm getting off point a bit, back to December shit. So we had a Christmas party at work, why I went I still don't know but I know now after that I don't belong here. Because of all these emotions of resentment and longing, I finally broke down and brought a web cam. I've yet to use it, but I feel a bit better just knowing I have it. I had a few days off after buying the web cam, or at least I thought I did. I get my weekly schedule every Monday so I know my when I work until the following Tuesday. That's a pretty simple system, one that would attribute some planning (since I don't work on Mondays) and conscientious thinking toward my job security. But that wouldn't be the Ryan's way, so poo on me. They changed my schedule and never gave me a notice. They told my that I need to check the my schedule everyday for changes because on the there printed copy it says "subject to change". What it should say then is "Subject to change without notice" as to absolve confusion from both parties. But once again, that's not the Ryan's way. So they called me at 5:20 asking where I was. I told them That I wasn't scheduled to work that day and just in case of some error on my part I went and grabbed my copy of my schedule and sure enough I wasn't on. So they asked me to come in anyway because they would be down a dishwasher. I told them I would see them tomorrow and they needed to get someone to cover because I didn't have a ride. What I wanted to say was "Go fuck yourselves. If you motherfuckers don't have the fucking decency to call me or at least tell me when I was working that you changed my schedule, then you can stew in your stupidity and wash the dishes yourselves. I did click on them though so it isn't like I just caved in to them. That week I only worked two days because of Christmas. It was a bittersweet thing Because the only reason I go to that hell hole is for the money. December was a big disappointment for me; I really got nothing accomplished that I'd set out to do. On the bright side I did get my axe back, I have Kiwi to thank for that, so Thanks again Kiwi. Before I wrap up December, New years eve. I worked, then I called peoples in Wisco. If those of you recall, I told you that guns where being fired well here's the proof.
2010: DEAD
Break time #2
If you don't think that this is great, you are wrong.
***Resume Session***
2011: Live
JANUARY
I can't say much for the new year as of now. I know one thing though, I can't wait for it to be March! Being back in town would be fucking awesome!! But I digress, it's a new year. What the fuck has happened this month? Oh yeah it snowed here and people flipped shit. The city of Concord was closed. The fucking city was closed. I didn't know a city closed, so this was news to me. For two days the city stayed closed, hell schools still hasn't resumed (effectively giving every student 9 days off). All of this for an inch and a half of snow, which turned into an inch of ice. Now I know what your thinking, "an inch of ice can be hazardous." True, if it was somewhere where it could be a hazard. The roads have been cleared of all ice and snow since Tuesday at around 2 in the afternoon. Once more the stupidity of Ryan's had to come into play. This time in the fashion of not giving me notice of our establishments closure. Apparently we were close all day Monday and Tuesday. I never received a call to tell me this information. According to them I should have called to see if we were open. Now by applying that logic I would need to call there every day I had work to make sure we're still open. Yep that makes just as much sense to you as it does to me. Luckily I'm not the only employee there who's sick of being jerked around. From what I here, our 3 best guys; I being one of them are all talking about quitting. I want to see how fast that mother fucker would get shut down with all those lazy ass toss-pots at the helm. Oh, that would be a most joyous occasion. We'll see what the future hold for us children. Thanks for actually reading this. It's the accumulation of two and a half months for procrastination so I hope it was worth it. If it wasn't well the fuck you Mr. and/or Miss I have high expectations from Jacob. Thanks again I guess I can get back on track now; you know it being the new year and all. Until then folks, until then.
NOVEMBER
Sorry for being a lazy ass for the month. I wanted to write but hell, I was busy playing games online and generally being miserable about not having a job, then about being in NC. Oh, yeah, I got a job on the 11th. Where you might ask? A place called Ryan's. It's owned by buffets inc., the same people that own O.C.B. At first I was happy to be working for a corporation, stability wise at least. How fucking wrong was I? After my first day I asked about getting my schedule. They told me they would call me. As an added measure of security I told them that I would call them too just in case they lost my number or something. I called them once on Friday, Saturday and Sunday (mind you I started working on a Wednesday) each time they told me it wasn't ready and they'd give a call when it was. They never called me. Then the following Tuesday at 16:15, I get a call from them saying I was supposed to be there 15 minutes ago. At that time not only was I not ready (i.e. showered & shaved) , I wasn't even home. So I rushed home got my shit and made it to work by 5:26. When I get there my manager Buddy (his name is really Buddy) cracked a joke about my tardiness; he was the one who was supposed to contact me about my schedule. I was fucking livid. If I was white I'm sure I would have been beet red with rage. Not only was I mad as fuck but I also wasn't used to the volume of work I was doing so I screwed up a hell of lot that day. Fast forward a week, things start panning out and I'm getting used to everything. I find out that I'm working Thanksgiving woo fucking hoo. It ended up working out though because me ma ended up working thanksgiving too. So we had thanksgiving dinner the day after. That about wraps up November.
But before I consider Nov. complete, here is what work looks like for me.
Break time #1
Sometimes in life you'll have to do some shit that you don't want to do. Better buck the fuck up Gordon Freeman style!
***Resume Session***
DECEMBER
Ah, December the month that really made me start missing home and other stuff too.
So going into December, I'm used to work, being isolated, and I've stopped giving a shit about the people I live and work around, at least the ones who are from here, and that one F.I.B. at Wal-mart. I remember one day before work I was messing around on my phone and I decided to look at all the pictures I took. All those good memories. All the stuff I loved. I swear at that moment I was crying, but no tears came out. It was as if my heart was sinking into nothingness. It felt truly awful, horrific really. I felt like I was never going to see anyone again. Like it was impossible to return to my life. So I went to work, stewing in that mindset. I've been slowly distancing myself from my co-workers ever since. I can't enjoy anything living so far away from my life. It would be different if I came down here for myself, but I didn't. I came down here because my mom needed the help. I'm hoping my dad can get back on his feet and start working before I go. I know that my mom can't support the way they live right now, and if my dad gets a job I will no longer be duty bound to stay. Whoa, I'm getting off point a bit, back to December shit. So we had a Christmas party at work, why I went I still don't know but I know now after that I don't belong here. Because of all these emotions of resentment and longing, I finally broke down and brought a web cam. I've yet to use it, but I feel a bit better just knowing I have it. I had a few days off after buying the web cam, or at least I thought I did. I get my weekly schedule every Monday so I know my when I work until the following Tuesday. That's a pretty simple system, one that would attribute some planning (since I don't work on Mondays) and conscientious thinking toward my job security. But that wouldn't be the Ryan's way, so poo on me. They changed my schedule and never gave me a notice. They told my that I need to check the my schedule everyday for changes because on the there printed copy it says "subject to change". What it should say then is "Subject to change without notice" as to absolve confusion from both parties. But once again, that's not the Ryan's way. So they called me at 5:20 asking where I was. I told them That I wasn't scheduled to work that day and just in case of some error on my part I went and grabbed my copy of my schedule and sure enough I wasn't on. So they asked me to come in anyway because they would be down a dishwasher. I told them I would see them tomorrow and they needed to get someone to cover because I didn't have a ride. What I wanted to say was "Go fuck yourselves. If you motherfuckers don't have the fucking decency to call me or at least tell me when I was working that you changed my schedule, then you can stew in your stupidity and wash the dishes yourselves. I did click on them though so it isn't like I just caved in to them. That week I only worked two days because of Christmas. It was a bittersweet thing Because the only reason I go to that hell hole is for the money. December was a big disappointment for me; I really got nothing accomplished that I'd set out to do. On the bright side I did get my axe back, I have Kiwi to thank for that, so Thanks again Kiwi. Before I wrap up December, New years eve. I worked, then I called peoples in Wisco. If those of you recall, I told you that guns where being fired well here's the proof.
2010: DEAD
Break time #2
If you don't think that this is great, you are wrong.
***Resume Session***
2011: Live
JANUARY
I can't say much for the new year as of now. I know one thing though, I can't wait for it to be March! Being back in town would be fucking awesome!! But I digress, it's a new year. What the fuck has happened this month? Oh yeah it snowed here and people flipped shit. The city of Concord was closed. The fucking city was closed. I didn't know a city closed, so this was news to me. For two days the city stayed closed, hell schools still hasn't resumed (effectively giving every student 9 days off). All of this for an inch and a half of snow, which turned into an inch of ice. Now I know what your thinking, "an inch of ice can be hazardous." True, if it was somewhere where it could be a hazard. The roads have been cleared of all ice and snow since Tuesday at around 2 in the afternoon. Once more the stupidity of Ryan's had to come into play. This time in the fashion of not giving me notice of our establishments closure. Apparently we were close all day Monday and Tuesday. I never received a call to tell me this information. According to them I should have called to see if we were open. Now by applying that logic I would need to call there every day I had work to make sure we're still open. Yep that makes just as much sense to you as it does to me. Luckily I'm not the only employee there who's sick of being jerked around. From what I here, our 3 best guys; I being one of them are all talking about quitting. I want to see how fast that mother fucker would get shut down with all those lazy ass toss-pots at the helm. Oh, that would be a most joyous occasion. We'll see what the future hold for us children. Thanks for actually reading this. It's the accumulation of two and a half months for procrastination so I hope it was worth it. If it wasn't well the fuck you Mr. and/or Miss I have high expectations from Jacob. Thanks again I guess I can get back on track now; you know it being the new year and all. Until then folks, until then.
Monday, October 25, 2010
Time will make you realize
Howdy folks!It's been what, a week and a half since I've last wrote? Miss me such? I bet not, but I wager so. What's happened in the past week plus? Oh! I carved my pumpkin; it's not the pumpkin I wanted but I worked with what was generously given to me.
I'll just show you guys what I've been up to with the pumpkin as well as a few of my other Halloween projects around the house.
It's not much but It's been keeping my boredom at bay. In other news, my dad has finally come down. With my sister and her baby mind you. Yup, the whole family (that's located in the continental U.S.) is back together. I need to get the hell out of here. Needless to say my dad is the same overgrown child he has always been, yet he seems worse. I don't get this because he was the one who wanted to live here. This is supposedly his dream come true; so why is he still acting like a fuckhead? Although I don't have a definite conclusion, I do believe that his behavior is steaming from his loss of control of my mother. Since coming out here my mom; normally a social recluse, has been invited to parties (and actually accepting the invitation) and has been greeted warmly by her co-workers. This coupled with the two months apart from my dad has made her a little more self reliant, and quite a bit more courageous. Because of this new found courage, my mom has been drilling the fuck out of my dad about getting a job. Normally she'd give up and end up pulling some more OT at work however, she can't do that down here so she's growing a backbone and tearing my dad a new one.
Break Time!
The more you know, the less likely you'll become one of the living dead.
This is just beautiful.
Resume Session
In other news, I've been chatting with Karleisa a whole lot more lately. It seems that something went down with Coop and he's become depressed again. A couple of days ago,Coop left me a message saying that he was going to kill himself, unfortunately I was asleep. I called him four different times before he called me back at 10:30ish to tell me he was still alive. Luckily Jao talked him out of it the night before. After all that jazz things seemed to simmer down. I talked to Karleisa yesterday and found out that Chris and Coop were going over to Holly's. I wanted to call Coop but I didn't know when he returned from her house so I waited to call him lest I here Holly's voice in the back round and my blood boils again. Hopefully all is well and I can talk to him unhindered tonight.
Oh the things I do for my friends.
I'll just show you guys what I've been up to with the pumpkin as well as a few of my other Halloween projects around the house.
It's not much but It's been keeping my boredom at bay. In other news, my dad has finally come down. With my sister and her baby mind you. Yup, the whole family (that's located in the continental U.S.) is back together. I need to get the hell out of here. Needless to say my dad is the same overgrown child he has always been, yet he seems worse. I don't get this because he was the one who wanted to live here. This is supposedly his dream come true; so why is he still acting like a fuckhead? Although I don't have a definite conclusion, I do believe that his behavior is steaming from his loss of control of my mother. Since coming out here my mom; normally a social recluse, has been invited to parties (and actually accepting the invitation) and has been greeted warmly by her co-workers. This coupled with the two months apart from my dad has made her a little more self reliant, and quite a bit more courageous. Because of this new found courage, my mom has been drilling the fuck out of my dad about getting a job. Normally she'd give up and end up pulling some more OT at work however, she can't do that down here so she's growing a backbone and tearing my dad a new one.
Break Time!
The more you know, the less likely you'll become one of the living dead.
This is just beautiful.
Resume Session
In other news, I've been chatting with Karleisa a whole lot more lately. It seems that something went down with Coop and he's become depressed again. A couple of days ago,Coop left me a message saying that he was going to kill himself, unfortunately I was asleep. I called him four different times before he called me back at 10:30ish to tell me he was still alive. Luckily Jao talked him out of it the night before. After all that jazz things seemed to simmer down. I talked to Karleisa yesterday and found out that Chris and Coop were going over to Holly's. I wanted to call Coop but I didn't know when he returned from her house so I waited to call him lest I here Holly's voice in the back round and my blood boils again. Hopefully all is well and I can talk to him unhindered tonight.
Oh the things I do for my friends.
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